I've hemmed and hawed for the last two hours over whether or not to write about what happened to me tonight, and while I probably shouldn't do it, I'm going to anyway. Because I know writing it down will make me feel better. And because (I hope) my mom and mother-in-law and friends with kids will comment and tell me that their kids have done the same thing to them and that they got over it.
Tom had to work late tonight - so goes the beginning (and the middle and the end) of the university semester. As a treat for the kids, who were missing their dad, we...
1. Went to Blockbuster to rent a movie.
2. Played on the indoor play structure at the McDonald's next door.
3. Purchased Happy Meals for dinner.
4. Had a picnic with said Happy Meals on the floor of the living room while watching the movie we rented.
5. Took a bath in Mom and Dad's "swimming pool" bathtub WITH the jets on.
6. Finished the movie curled up in beanbag chairs.
Not a bad evening, right? At least until that point it wasn't.
I asked Will to pick out a book to read before bed. He said no.
I told Will that his two choices were picking out a book to read before bed or going straight to bed. He said no.
I told Will that if he didn't make a choice I would make a choice for him. He said no and ran away.
I made the choice for him and put him straight to bed, at which point he told me he didn't like me anymore. Will tells me he doesn't like me whenever he doesn't like what I've asked him to do or not do, and while I tell him it hurts my feelings, I try not to overreact.
It was after I'd sent Will to bed and was tucking Hallie in that he went for it - he told me he wished I was dead.
I have no idea where he heard the phrase - we certainly don't use it in our house, and I'm pretty sure the four Disney Channel cartoons the kids watch On Demand don't either - and as it turns out, he doesn't really know what it means. He knew it was hurtful though, and he chose to direct it at me. (We did eventually discuss what Will said meant, how it made me feel, and better ways for him to express his anger. Not sure that conversation was all that productive.)
So I'm kind of sad, I'm pretty pissed off at Will, and I'm wishing there was a way write this outburst off as just another thing almost-five-year-olds do and eventually outgrow. Is it? That's what I'm wishing for tonight.